Women On Fire

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Its been tough.

Its been amazing .

Life has taken you to your edge more than you ever thought possible, the thoughts dreams hopes and fantasies of your youth got gritty and edgy and dirty and you thought and prayed on more than one occasion “Fuq I hope I get through this.”

Yet on the outside you looked for all the world like a woman coping with amazing adversity with grace poise and determination. The option of collapse just wasn’t on the cards there was too much riding on your success.

And even while people complemented you on your ability to get the job done, at home on your own you doubted your very ability to get up and do it all again the next morning.

You read books on self help Echart Toile and Brené Brown have been your bedtime companions, you bought yourself flowers, walked the dog fed your kids and kept the toilet paper stocked up. And Did. It all. Again. The next day.

You were hungry, you still are hungry, craving a desire for nourishment deep in your bones deep in your very soul that wakes you up every day, eyes on the horizon putting one foot in front of the other.

You gratitude prayer is your mantra, its your daily bread and butter whilst you put together that proposal and dream up the next step of your evolution.

Its been tough but the light is getting brighter, YOUR light is getting brighter.But hell it would be great to not have to do it all on your own.

A tribe, A team that has been there too. Has been there in the dark as you watched all that you knew and love vanish and yet you still drew breath.

You danced you swam, you made some very questionable decisions, repeatedly!

You learnt you experience you picked yourself up and fell down another rabbit hole!

Your not happy with the status quo, the mundane you can deal with but settling isn’t part of your vocabulary. Its not that you want lots of attention and ego stroking, just to give yourself the permission to fucking BE all that you are, permission to speak your truth and live your dharma, the role, the story, the magic that only you dear woman can sing into this world. I hear you!

The peak of your youth is just behind you, but you have never felt more at home in your body, more quietly confident, the fire in you is rising, the magic, the sex the power that is yours and only yours is simmering almost ready, you feel it yes?

 

I’m calling out to you women, high and low, good god I’d love to meet you how I’d love to have you on my team and share my story with you.

 

To sit around this virtual fireside and support each other and journey together that is my wish, is my heartfelt spiritual directive.

 

In ancient times we had a place, a collective and a space to weave and share and dream and birth our stories in this world.  To laugh and be deliciously wicked and wild. Dear one this is such a space. Come sit and play and laugh and heal.

Healing that will set your world on fire.

x

K

 

Ride that Unicorn to Boyfriend Town + other real life rituals of love!

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So. This weekend is Valentines Day. And you know what, I am really quite over having my otherwise gorgeous relaxing weekend taken over by some absolutely bullshit holiday or another! Yup I’m not even sugar coating this rant, its straight into it!

You see, as I found myself  today launching headlong into another grinch style moment over the upcoming Hallmark occasion, I realised, a little self consciously, that I go on like this a bit lately. As my mind tracked back over Australia Day, New Years Day, Christmas and please-don’t-even-get-me-started-on-things-like-Hens-Parties I saw a real trend happening here.

No, not that I’m a woman of a certain age that is single and gotten her Victoria Secrets in a twist.

That’s not it at all.

Really.

Its that I actually dearly love and cherish ritual in my life REAL ritual. Ritual that marks occasions with authenticity and thoughtfulness mindfulness and meaning and yes fun too! I have gotten to a point in my life that I’m finding it harder and harder to play along with occasions that I find honestly, quite distasteful and disrespectful to all involved.

Now I know, a bunch of you are reading this thinking yeah but I bet if she had a delish man in her life showering her with attention this weekend she’d change her tune. Well peeps unless someone gets their act into gear quick smart between now and Sat your going to have to wait a while to see what that metaphorical pudding looks like… um in about a years time. What I can say  is that in the beautiful romantic relationships in my past I have enjoyed sharing created rituals. How do you do that I hear you say?  Read on gorgeous ones read on!

Lets start with New Years as its the most recent.  I usually categorically avoid New Years, I’m not sure why, I think it just feels like there is so much pressure for it to be this evening of epic proportions. I have two caveats here and that involves Sydney Harbour  fire works and the New York Times Square dropping of the ball, other than that I’m in bed in time to get up and watch the sunrise.

This year things didn’t go to my control freaky plans but I did enjoy this beautiful new year sunrise and the next night which was the first new moon of the year I created a new year ritual.

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For this ritual you will need.

Something to safely burn small pieces of paper in. A pot out in the open or safely in the laundry sink is always a good idea.

Of course I have a cauldron!  Then add all your favourite things like candles, tea or your favourite yummy beverage, and a list.

On that list you are writing down all the things you have to thank the previous year for. The gifts and learnings, the fun stuff that you want more of  and the tricky stuff that you struggled through and learnt from and are ready to let go. You can write it down like your talking to someone or just list all the words thoughts and pictures down any ol’ how on a piece of paper.

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For my New Year Ritual I was home alone, I had my yummy tea, I was working through some new years plans and lists, I had candles burning and beautiful music playing.

The trick with any ritual isn’t that these things actually have  magical powers on their own, you see its all about your intention. For me these things set the mood, create the feeling of sacred space and open me up to the possibilities and dreams that are hiding away in my subconscious. If all you have time for is a five minute out loud wish list and blowing out a candle whilst you hide in the bathroom from your 4 year old playing hide and seek. I totally believe that works too!

The wonderful thing about this kind of ritual is that it works for lots of occasions. I did it to mark the new calendar year on the new moon. You could easily do it as friends of mine did for the Chinese New Year. Anniversaries and Birthdays are another beautiful time to re-asses and let go of the old and invite in the new!

 

So once you have that list all written out its time to set it on fire!

Now seriously, do I have to remind you to put the kids and the cats and curtains and the expensive silk highly flammable things away… far far away? I do? Ok go sort that stuff out then come back.

Now you set it on fire in the cauldron (big pot) and visualise your dreams and burdens streaming away into the ether to be filed in the appropriate cosmic filing cabinet as it goes up in smoke. Easy Peasy!

 

So whilst your working out how to apply this to our own lives, here are 5 sure fire ways to feel loved up and romanced with or without a romantic partner, this weekend or any other. Of course I have assigned them according to the elements.

 

Metal  – Give the gift of an occasion to yourself. Carve out time to read that book or watch your favourite film. Enjoy some time in nature or visit your local art gallery.

Fire  – Use Candles or scents to create a sensory experience in your home. Light candles for yourself and make an occasion of your evening meal. (ahem and yes put your phone away!)

Water- Run a bath to nurture yourself

Earth – Create a beautiful meal full of greens and beautiful flavours to nourish your senses.

Wood – Get sweaty and expressive and turn your fave tunes up nice and loud and dance like no-one is watching!!

 

 meljanephotography.com

In the last few weeks there have been quite a few beautiful opportunities to create and enjoy ritual in my world I believe its something  I will do more of  Here is the link to the gorgeous MelJanePhotography’s Blog. She was the photography for our friend Jodies’ pre wedding ritual. Jodie aptly titled it  ‘Secret Womens Business’  I had been calling it ‘its not a hens party’  You’ll see my cauldron in full swing in her photo above. It was truly such a beautiful night. It was a complete honour to help organise and I really didn’t realise until it was all happening just how special an event it was going to turn out to be.  We all left feeling full up and nourished in a way that only happens when women get together and celebrate and love each other.

That is my kind of Valentines Day!

 

Oh and the Unicorn in Boyfriend Town? Well I also used the above ritual to invite a new man into my life….. I’ll let you know how that gets on as news comes to hand!

x

K

 

 

 

“Here is your sign” (said the universe to the human)

I had a day not so long ago, that simply looked like this ……..

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I know I’m not alone.

I know it won’t be the last day I experience that overwhelming hectic paced busy mind. So busy and noisy that I wondered not once but probably a million times that day that maybe I might just go crazy. So on this day when my mind was a scribble of noise and clashing thoughts, I still did the laundry. I still walked the dog. I still went to work.

And all the while the noise raged on. And on. And on.

I spent the day watching this noise in what I believed was a detached albeit very frustrated way. Like someone had left the TV on with my most disliked show playing on endless repeat and I couldn’t switch it off. At all. Ever. It was exhausting.

As I was leaving work that night my mind raged on. I walked to the car park through the open field into the night. I reached the car park where it was lit but the dark night sky extended above me.

I was alone.

I sighed a big outloud exasperated sigh and pondered to myself how on Earth I was meant to create my magical world with my mind going over and over all the possible disastrous things that were of course in its worse case scenario setting going to happen to me. I wondered in that way where you can have what feels like one hundred thoughts in a split second. Thoughts become things Keri I thought to myself. Thoughts become things. And I sighed again and and thought out aloud.

Give. Me. A. Sign.

 

 

And this is what happened …….

Looking for a sign

Credit:Huffington Post

I couldn’t make this up if I tried. Before the word ‘sign’ was completely out of my mouth a star shot across the sky. It took about 5 seconds to finish its journey. Thats not a short amount of time, count it out now if you like.

One thousand, two thousand, three thousand, four thousand, five thousand.  It had a tail and everything!

My mouth was literally hanging open and I’m pretty sure I swore out loud to no one but the universe in particular. That’s the classy sort of gal I am.

And my mind was quiet.

 

I still get goosebumps thinking about this night as I write this. I don’t pretend to know exactly what the sign was for, but I’m guessing for me it means I’m not alone, I am loved, there is a point to all of it.

I remember thinking that here I was watching light that has made its way across the galaxy, witnessing something indescribable that probably happened aeons ago….. what are we all doing here on planet Earth if not witnessing each others light?

What I learnt that night though, was that you get the best view from a distant vantage point, so don’t doubt for one second Gorgeous One that your light is wasted, that its not seen, not bright enough or important enough. Your magic is being witnessed.

If your looking for a sign, waiting to be given the magical green light. Then this is it. GO!.

Shine your starlight .

x

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Constellation of the Heart

Contellation

Well hello there gorgeous new reader peeps!

This is one straight out of the archives from my old blog over on Blogger… I have kept it intact so I could keep the bats… yes the bats … you’ll see. I’m so delighted to have you on board, there will be more updates from me soon, but for the mean while enjoy…..

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As I sit down tonight ready to write the post that I have been composing in my head for most of the day I realise tonight isn’t her night…..something else has made its presence felt and I’m not quite sure how I’m going to manage it!

Tonight will be about the Shen and the heart and the internal fire that steers us onward on our own little life paths.

How do I write about the Shen? And how do I make is seem accessible and meaningful in todays world? Not just something that we see and read as poetic, but ultimately inapplicable to our daily practical lives?

I’m not sure, but this is where I will start…

The Shen is the soul that resides in the heart, which is of the fire element, the colour red and the emotion of joy. This is soul most like what we in the west would call the ‘soul’. The light of life that is reflected in the eyes of a happy vibrant person, that extra spark that we see in people that are calm and composed and radiant.

When happily ‘housed’ in the heart the Shen is often talked about as a small flock of birds that when at peace reside contentedly in the heart  (cue the pigeons cooing!) When shocked or subject to strong emotion or conflict the birds flee, dispersing in all directions. This leaves us feeling uncentered, ungrounded and confused, not sure of what our true purpose is and quite literally asking ourselves what do I do now?

Most of us unfortunately will have felt this feeling; a car accident, receiving shocking news. My Shen most definitely flew the coop the night my dog was hit by a car. (He and my Shen are both doing well in rehab!)

 

This feeling though and the disturbance of the Shen isn’t reserved for these more extreme events. The fast pace of our lives and the modern environments we are creating and living in don’t always serve our highest needs. The noise, static and relentless pace rattles our emotional body, exhausts our physical body and the shen, lacking sufficient protection becomes disturbed.  Zen Master Robert Aitkens has been quoted as saying that the shock many of us are living in has us “rationalising ourselves into insensitivity”

 

What does this result in for our physical health?  Insomnia, anxiety, depression and in the more extreme cases addiction and mental and emotional illness.

 

The retreat where I work is having a specialty week on Sleep. The clients I saw today all had insomnia and sleep issues, and they all had Shen disturbances. Some were more obviously emotionally related to acute events, some were long standing, related to inability to cope with change, lack of purpose and exhaustion due to over work. They all had heart burn and other heat related digestive symptoms. Their healing is going to take TIME. And I stress this, because as I write, I’m thinking to myself, keep it relevant, keep it practical give the readers something easy to take home with them…….

The really tricky thing this isn’t easy. Not in the drive through, double macchiato kind of way we have gotten used to…easy.

 

Our spirit, our Shen is in itself pure yang, pure divine light.  Its not until it is housed in the yin casing of the heart and we live through it and it through us that it is seen and experienced.

To heal and recall the dispersed light of the shen we need to cultivate a peaceful place for it to come home to. For some people this is going to take a while and it will involve regular treatment and the creation of peaceful spaces both internal and external. Once again this doesn’t have to involve removing oneself to a mountain top (although that is lovely! )

 

  • Mindfulness meditation 10 min per day is a perfect start.
  • Nourishing food to ground the Yi and the Hun
  • Limit stimulants
  • Honour your emotions with journal writing… it doesn’t have to be Homers Odyssey, just get those feelings out.
  • And by all means seek integrated medical advice from a GP versed in nutritional sciences.

 

Spend time with yourself, please don’t write this off as impossible. I know some houses where the glow of the TV dominates every meal. Give your energetic body a break every now and then. You will be rewarded with more enthusiasm and purpose in the rest of your day.

 

As I wrote this post tonight a bat entered my apartment! Not a flying fox, a straight from Bram Stoker, Batman emblem  bat! It flew around and around and for a second I thought about trying to catch it. Then I remembered that of course bats are almost blind but they navigate by echolocation so I should just sit still and it will find the window. It clearly didn’t want to go back out the window it came and and whooshed itself down the stairs and into the kitchen, I followed and (dog in arms) opened the front door and sure enough out it went. It didn’t bump into anything not the bannister, tall vases or laundry.

 

Our Shen is a bit like that bat, it has its own innate sense of direction…. give it space give it time be patient open a few doors and windows and watch you never know just where it will lead you!

 

I used to love watching these starlings in Ireland. I was reminded of them as I wrote this tonight.  They do this amazing dance together then go home to roost. Quite perfect really. For our spirits to soar they need a place to come home to.

K

x

 

 

Murmuration!

 

 

Magical Thinking

Once upon a time  I was a hippy chick, well actually I was a punker hippy chick…. Yes really! Faux fur leopard print hot pants and black gothic lace and pixie hair just to prove it. I did pagan things and believed in witch craft… you know like on Charmed!

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Ummmm Yep thats me at 21!

 

I had talismans and Goddesses all over my house and celebrated the turning of the seasons with feasts and parties. I even left a piece of my birthday cake out side for the fairies each year. Yup I really did!

Over the years since then, with travel, age and life experience my focus has changed. I surely haven’t become ‘straight or normal’… whatever that looks like, but the grandiose practices have given way to observing the magical in everyday life. When life has become hectic I have celebrated the turning of seasons with a nod, a midnight walk or a cup of rose tea at sunrise.

There are less talismans heaving on every surface… ok well except the owls and the unicorns of course… but I have felt that less was more and that power or strength came from with in me and that there was less need for external reminders.

So when I stumbled across Violet Gray on ETSY I was looking for a beautiful gift for my bestie…. Saturn Return can REALLY suck, I wanted something gorgeous and magical to remind her of her own beauty and magic. Et Viola!.. a new addiction had begun! And I was back in the magical talisman territory!

E-stalking some  gorgeous pieces a few month later for myself I found  this bracelet ” Communicate” and I knew it was mine!

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This year ahead is very much about communication for me; writing, blogging and speaking, so the intention of its creation and the symbolism of the crystals really spoke to me.

Talismans like this don’t suddenly bestow magical new abilities upon us (thus far.. but I WILL get back to you on that!)  I believe though that they are a gorgeous token of focus and reasurance to remind me when I look down to speak my truth and shine my light! The crystals themselves encourage us to resonate with their intended  frequencies, just by being what they are.

Thats practical magic at work!

 

Do you employ magical thinking in your day?

What magical reminders do you wear or have in your space to offer you a reminder of your own strength?

I’d love to hear about them.

To comment below just click the tiny ‘comment’ … yes it is tiny… I’m working on that!

xx