On August the 5th in a few weeks time I will have been here on planet Earth for 40 years.
Turning 40 for most women is a big crazy cue to have a complete breakdown and start questioning their lives and everything they have ever done. I’ve seen it many times which is why as I approach my own 40th I’m keeping things in perspective.
I’m treating it as a pretty amazing privilege that not all people get to experience, and I am choosing my language very carefully. I and not 40. I have simply been here for 40 years. The ageing process of our bodies is not exclusively tied to the years you spend spinning around the sun, its just one factor.
Here’s 6 things that I am being mindful of as I approach my birthday to keep the crazy at bay.
Seriously when did we get all hung up about being past it and not express gratitude and amazement at the fact that we get to live a big long gloriously full life? Start a gratitude diary or before you go to sleep each night cast your mind over 3 things that your grateful for.
2. Don’t compare
Your unique life journey and your unique set of skills and experiences aren’t going to look like anyone else’s. Every book on the shelf of life is a TOTALLY different story. Own this and back the heroine in yours… she’s doing a great job! It has been helpful to remind myself of what I truly value and see how I am cultivating these things in my life. My commitment to Love is no exception.
3. Ignore the popular cultural stereotype we are often sold.
I went looking on pinterest last night and searched turning forty positive. Do you know how many pins I found. One. Thats right, in all of pinterest town there is ONE pin that puts a positive spin on turning 40. So I dug a bit deeper and found this little gem from Sheryl Crow and even she was struggling! Look away from all the memes telling you that its all over and find some inspirational women your age doing great things and keeping it real. They can be famous like Megan Gale and Angelina Jolie, both turning 40 this year or gorgeous women in your circle who are creating their own reality of the aging process.
4. So you didn’t have a baby.
Your worth as a woman and a human isn’t determined on this event. (Despite the social pressure of epic proportions) There will be many reasons that this wasn’t in your life path. There may be a great deal of grief over this for lots of different reasons. I know for myself that even though its been a conscious choice of mine not to have babies there is still a sense of grieving those alternate life possibilities that never eventuated. Let yourself have this process. Your unfolding into a new phase of your life, and its going to be delicious!
5. Check in with your limiting beliefs.
Yes there are different stages and phases in our lives where our priorities change and our bodies work differently. We need to take good care of our health for sure, but be gently and lovingly aware of what you may be telling yourself. Many of these beliefs may not even be yours. This interview with Dr Christine Northrup discusses just this.
I recall a conversation with a girlfriend of mine two years ago discussing the fact that bang on 40th her eyesight went. She proclaimed with such commitment that that is just what happens. Everyone she knew got glasses on their 40th birthday and that was that. With a big sigh she told me to wait and see. Well see I am and instead of checking my eyesight I’m checking in with my beliefs. (I’m not an affiliate of this book and yes its a 20 min video but the gems of wisdom from Dr Northrup are PRICELESS)
6. Take the pressure down.
So for anyone in this age bracket and especially us Aussies… this should really make you laugh. 1 for its oh so cheesy iconic 80’s references and 2 because its truth, sad, tacky, 80’s truth.
All the ‘by now I should haves’… or worse ‘at my age its all over’… enough!
Take. The. Pressure. DOWN.